ERROR 707

    As usual, alarm clock went crazy at 7 in the morning and after seven pull-ups(7^th attempt of hitting the snooze button) I finally decided to break up with the inside of my eye-lids just to discover that my alarm clock was LOL (LAUGHING OUT LOUD) at me until I realized that it was turned upside down and it was 7:07 AM.

              As I reached to set it straight, I discovered a coffee mug on my table. I wondered its presence as I was home-alone. So I decided to put it in kitchen first. As I picked it up, I accidentaly knocked the Bisleri by its side and water got spilled on the floor. "Damn!" I said and finally decided to get-up from my bed. As I stepped down, I fell due to the spilled water on the floor. The fall affected the back-pain I had from past days , so I decided to take the pills. Ironically, It was quite unwise of me to put the back-pain meds at the bottom shelf.I thereupon saw my laptop was bleeding red and pleading me so that I would make it bleed blue. (You know if there was ever a porn-world for dell laptops, my DELL would love it anal style as there’s always a charger stuffed up in its arse).So I decided to charge it but before that my eyes fell upon the TV remote. I realize that tonight when I  will go watch TV, I’ll be looking for the remote but I won’t remember that it’s on the table so I decided to put it where it belongs but before that I had to charge my laptop to check my e-mails later. As I further approached, electricity went off.

            Then I noticed the coffee mug still there so I decided to make some coffee. I took the mug and rushed to the kitchen and made coffee. Before I could take a sip, I noticed my reading glasses at the top of the refrigerator that I have been searching for last two days. I left the mug and decided to better put the glasses in my desk. On my way to reach the desk, I saw my book at the dining table. I thought if parents might suddenly bust in the house, atleast I should take my book in hand and pretend to read so I left the glasses there and carried the book to keep it in my room. As I reached my room, I saw the tumbled water still on the floor. In danger of likely to fell again I left the book and went to kitchen to get some towels and wipe up the spill. After that, as I was wondering what was I doing, my eyes captured the bike-keys laying  on the chair. “Oops” I said. “Darn it. I was supposed to wash the bike due to the Roadrash driving in the mud last night.” Electricity was back by then so I switched ON the motor and went outside deciding to wash my bike. As I headed towards the porch,  I saw a mail dropped in the mail-box. I quickly left and rushed to get the mail as I was expecting my admit card for an entrance examination and there it was. So I went inside to put it in safe place. Then I headed down the drawing-hall trying to recall what was I planning to do.

At the end of the day: My bike isn’t washed. My laptop is dead. I didn’t take my meds for back-pain. I can’t find the remote. I can’t find the glasses. I can’t find my emergency-book. Motor is still on. There’s a cold coffee mug in the kitchen.I don’t remember what I did to the bike-keys.

I realized I had a damn busy day and tried to take a nap. As I lied down, my alarm-clock was still LAUGHING OUT LOUD at me (7:07 PM).

[EDITED] At the end of the day: Alarm clock was still upside down!

PS: Do me a favor! Share it to all your friends because I don’t know where the heck did I shared this.

TOPDOG PERSONAbiLITIES

Most enthrall and happening three sports of all time- CRICKET, LAWN-TENNIS and SOCCER.

 If I ask you -Name the topmost conspicuous sportsman of the millenium? Probably,most of you would name them as listed:

*Sachin Tendulkar *Roger Federer *Michael phelps *Pele *Lance armstrong *Tiger Woods *Gary Kasparov *Michael Schumacher *Michael Jordan *Mohammed Ali  *Dhyaan Chand  (no particular order)

I didn't mention their names just because I'm a big die-hard fan but because they were/are really the bestest of best at  their related fields.

TOP THREE:

1. SACHIN-CRICKET GOD

   One of those humans who reflects the image of GOD. When I didn't knew about the cricket god(sachin), the only thing that attracted my attention were CRICKETS(insects)outside my house. But as of now, I like it as its a Gentleman's game which seems to be quite free from hooliganism (unlike Ice hockey, PAK cricket team etc). Although there are other cases like doping, slow over rates, match fixing and more. But its been taken care of, by the assosciations (atleast we believe so). Cricket in India binds all four directions of our nation tightly. The Sachin factor has played a significant role in it.  A cricketer who has never been affected by age and continues to have the hunger for success burning in him, as was evident when he achieved his dream of lifting the World Cup at the age of 38 when most cricketers at that age would be hanging up their boots.  Despite growing talks of his retirement, Sachin continues to keep his critics guessing, inspire the nation and still remains the one man who can bring a billion people come to a stand still when he’s batting.

 

*Pay attention to the attention- SACHIN and RETIREMENT shouldn't be used in the same sentence, unless there's "should not  be taking" term added to in the middle.

2. ROGER FEDERER-

 

 29 years old but still the best at lawn-tennis. Roger still remains a force to be reckoned with on the grass despite the emergence of Novak Djokovic.  A classy player who displays extraordinary poise always, be it when he wins or he loses, Federer is similar to Sachin Tendulkar in the fact that he refuses to listen to his critics who tell him it’s time to hang up his boots and continues to fight on. Although Rafael Nadal makes it stimulating difficult for federer at clay court but he obviously can't beat Fedex in Greatness(No one can). As of now, only FEDERER or fedERROR can beat Federer.

3. Michael Phelps-

Like Simon Burnett(British freestyler) said- "He’s not from another planet. He’s from the future.”

 

  Michael  is definitely the embodiment of greatness and its an honor to watch him swim. The spectacle of his swims is appreciated not just by the ‘occasional blogger’ like me but by the likes of other famous athletes at the elite level(that matters most).He remains to be the greatest on Olympic medal count and there are no superlatives worthy of what just gets unfolded by him every now or again at the olympic level.

**LIONEL MESSI**(ARCHANGEL OF SOCCER)

   I know that top-three sportsperson's list is over but I think we can make exception for the ‘barca argentine player’- MESSI.

"He’s a joy to watch but not much fun to play against"(says U.S. captain Landon Donovan)  

 Greatness and Messi sounds synonymous to each other. He may be short in stature but leaves every player on the planet look like a midget in front of him due to his sheer brilliance with the football, for they know he can leave them gasping for breath and completely flat-footed while he races away at lightning speed with the ball calmly slotting it into the goal and celebrating like a kid, leaving them to bury their faces in their hands. I bet there's no single defender in soccer who can challenge him one-on-one(or maybe two-on-one).Although I'm a fan of CR too but still 'comparing L.Messi to C.Ronaldo is as same as comparing Ricky ponting to Sachin Tendulkar'*no offense*  Ronaldo is a little bit aggressive and ironically, his Achilles heel lies in his head.

(* IRONIC La Liga at its best-  'pass the ball to XAVI dammit'  and 'hey!You three defenders!Go stop MESSI')

Honest Question-'Do you think it takes a little bit away from Lionel's greatness provided the fact that he doesn't perform at the same level in country?'#just asking

PS:

 Kudos to all these players for their STRONG WILL and WEAK WON’T

Dear Me: a Letter to My Fifteen-Year-Old Self

Dear me@15,
                      This mail is probably gonna reach you when you must be lost in the amidst of hopeless undertaking and idiocy.Better listen to every single word I say as I know you pretend to listen but in fact you don’t give a darn.
  To start things off, your indecisiveness sucks. Sooner or later, you will start thinking of opting for SCIENCE objects. Don’t go for mathematics because you suck at it, even today.
You look terrible in your repulsive over-coat  which you’re gonna wear it at your upcoming farewell(ADVICE: Avoid wearing if you can)
   Find an appropriate way to break up with her. The way you both ended wasn’t cool as you suck at goodbyes too.Hey!  Don’t worry as you are gonna  fall in love more times than you can count and end up in break heart (s).(TIP: Stick to the LOVE.LOSE.LOVE-AGAIN  theory.)
  Spend some time at the village, nanny will be gone soon. At last you will win the battle of acne and will soon get rid of them. Be the pensive moron that you are, chicks dig that shit.
  By the way, just a head-start. DON’T go for the long-distance relationship few years later. Apparently it will be a relationship minus phone sex kindaa delapidated relation, so it’s a lose-lose scenario.
 And few years later, you will lose your embarass-ginity when you’re gonna dump your gf on her birthday. You were totally unaware of her special day and this is the only waspish-part of yours I could hate.
 Keep writing.I know you suck at it, but sooner  you may start sucking at it less(Atleast I believe so) and will find something else to suck at(engineering).Oh yeah boy! You will fall for the engineering trap!
 Listen to AC/DC instead of BACKSTREET and BLUE.Its way cooler and enamoured.
 Quit the center-forward position in football. Play at the mid-field, you are good at it.(Afterall, scoring isn’t the only good part, passing is)
 Well everything will be unvarying even after giving you my feeble advices. So there’s no point in putting sense into you anyway. You will live your life in your own way and will do the same mistakes again. And you will grow up and ultimately become me@22 . One fine day you will regret the mistakes you did and that day would be your 22nd birthday and will write crap what you’re reading right now.Sadly you will not end up where you wanted to be, but you will end up where you need to be.  Like they say, it’s all written, in destiny or on internet.

LOVE,
Me @22
PS
Be Brave(but look who’s talking).

      
        
                    

    

LAPTOP in LIMBO

LAPTOP in LIMBO

  Just a quick update to let ya'all know that my two-year old  laptop which I reformatted as recently as past three-weeks, has decided to slip into a limbo. This isn’t entirely unfortunate, as it means I will be putting more time towards my preparation for joining a company in NOIDA (related: I still didn't get the offer-letter though),

  Well, I want you to know from the left-out space from the bottom of my heart that DELL battery backup sucks. The battery level has decreased to J.Beiber's p***s.And Apparently, its sound system reminds me of the faint voice of the female porn-star who pretends to blow by over deep-throat procedure.Earlier today, I put my laptop in my lap and ended up screaming plus scorched thighs.
  When I bought it, I thought I would take it to the terrace and shout at the utmost top that- "I have got the most awesomest thing ever" but now Deeds are same but words are changed. I don't know what exactly the words are but they certainly includes 'fucked up' and 'throw right now'.
  I tried opening it for some reason though, but the more IC (I see), the less I understand. I really do wish that my laptop would discontinue doing such stupor things.It currently seems beyond my expertise to repair it. Its not dead yet(just slightly faint)
 I'm gonna miss the On-site warranty though.

Not much else is up. *Switched to FACEBOOK now*

LIVE FOREVER DIE WHENEVER

How many days we have actually LIVED on planet earth?like lived for real?
BIG question. isn't it?

A day will finally come, sooner or later, when my substantial, slightly fat body will be covered neatly with a white sheet tucked under all directions of a air-mattress, probably located in a hospital sorrounded with the living folks. At that moment, a doctor will take control of the situation and determine that my body is ceased to function and all my purposes, intents, dreams,in fact ,my so-called-life has stopped.

At that particular time, dont declare myself the irreversible-end-of-life and dont call that mattress, my death bed. Rephrase and let it be called LIFE BED. Let my body be taken to help others lead fuller lives.

 I would like to donate my EYES to someone who never saw a sunrise,who never saw her mother who gave birth to him/her, who never saw a newborn baby's face and never saw true love in the eyes of a woman.

 Give my heart to someone whose own heart has been broken several times and has caused nothing but endless days of pain.

 Inquire into my senses and take away every nerves or cells possible so that someday a speechless human would shout out loud for justice, a temporarily silent boy would loud cry to call his pals to play and a guy would express his love to a girl he loves. A deaf girl would hear the sound of rain from her window and a someone could smell the wet soil after-rain.

 Give my kidneys to someone who has to depend on a damn machine to exist. Take my bones, cells, fibres,nerve anything and find a way to make a disabled, crippled child walk.
 Tweak my DNA and give the extension of longevity to some great people who deserved to live long.

  Take everything what's left in me, bury them and disperse my ashes in the wind to help flowers grow.
 Want to bury something? bury my faults, mistakes, weakness and misdeeds ,i did it to my pals and fellow-man.
 If you promise to do this what i've asked for, then i will probably live forever. That would be my ultimate goal and then  I would proudly say that ' I actually did LIVED on planet earth.

      I think there are many ways one can express love, but the bestest way is through writing the feelings. However, a lot of people find it difficult to pen down their thoughts. This is where sayings come into play, they act as a catalyst bringing out your romantic feelings of the heart.
In my case, i fell for someone I shouldn't.. it was beyond my control.I feel cold and warm at the same time and keep reading her texts for a hundred times. A simple name of hers has conquered my whole mind. Its like she came and never left.


FEW MONTHS EARLIER

       I was getting ready for my daily evening football.. and it just rained.I know football plus rain are just the best combinations ever,even more than coffee plus cigarettes :P But still for the first time in my life, i preferred sitting at my sweet home being online on MR. Zuckerberg's invention to playing soccer. What i saw on my home page was a friend suggestion of my high-school mate..She used to be my bench-mate.I got excited and quickly send her a request. I sat down and thought about her for a while. Before i could think much,  within a fractions of seconds, my request got accepted..HALA fb :) now i pinged her on fb. and she replied.I felt real good as we were talking like after 5 years or so.We chatted a little and before she could say (hardest)goodbye, i took chance and asked for her phone number.I know its not wrong,as in some point of my life we used to sit together.But still asking a girl for her number is the scariest thing ever.Suppose when you confront a girl ,then asking for her no. would bring fear in your mind and you might have some nasty side-effects like sweating forehead, palms and stuttering when talking to her :P But unlike this, asking online is the easiest way ever. You can simply ask for it if she is a old friend of yours..no paranoia for rejection.
Just dont try this with strangers at first attempt , its like jumping six steps ahead, and the void may mess up your colloquy :P
   
          So, the girl I m talkin about here is umm mm..leave.. I call her ROMSHI, because thats the sweetest name I ever heard, from a seniore in the college..He narrated the story behind this name.so I know.
 Its like this-one day,my seniore boozed heavily and a fresher entered in the campus. Ragging or intro to a lil extent was okay that time.So he asked her name with his red eyes staring at her, she got scared and with her tiny eyes said- 'romshi' sir
"Where you from? and what the hell does your name mean and who gave u dat name anyway huh.?" -seniore with a heavy voice like a submachine gun of words in his mouth
"Sir, I'm from KASHMIR and my mom named me after a 'river' passing by the side of our village.I dont know what that means sir" :( - romshi with a fearful and depressing voice
seniore said- ' why dont u turn around and go ask your mom, what if the river passing the side of your village was 'BRAHAMAPUTRA'? what den huh? "
//hehe ..that was funny.. I dont know what happened  to her but anyways that sweet name got stuck in my mind so I will prefer calling my school mate by that name ;)

            I dint know why the hell was I curious to call her at the same day.. I mean 'come on Sumit.u got to have some attitude'. My mind was yelling me to stick with a 3 day rule.But my heart..ahh..it always mess things up ;)
"why wait for 3 days.when you have her number and come on shes just  my old friend" i said to myself.

She uploaded a few pics in her fb a/c and they were too good,and it was like half a decade since our last talks, mayb thats why I was desperate to talk to her.
 She is 5.4"approx and is beautiful. She wear spects and her hair are like wine coloured and falling perfectly on her cute face. She is cute enough to make someone look twice and kindaa girl who can make you smile.. In school, we used to tease each other well and she was sick of me.hehe.. I was naughty then and we used to fight with each other for small things.  But that were sweet old days, and as days pass and change ,so do ppl.But that wasnt de case with Romshi.
        I called her that day, we talked for a while, and to my surprise,she remembered a lot about school time and me.I was like ..whoaa.!! beauty with  memories huh :P . I started liking her.
        We dint talked much as mayb she dont prefer chatting with cell..but still I used to send that Chain messages like choose a colour or date etc. hoping for her reply and may be then develop a conversation or so.Normally,it does work ;)
So, One day. my chain message worked and we startd talking.Finally when the conversation was about to end, I asked her if she has a boyfriend.
ahh damn.!! why would I asked that..thats the sickest thing girl could hear from a guy she talked for only few hours..But I asked gently,with a winking similey [;)], not pushing her to really answer seriously and to my bad, she replied 'yes' without a simily. At that time I felt like a blade cutting right through my heart.I don't know why the hell i felt that, but it was a weird kindaa feeling..terrific.
But still we talked whenever we get time..may be in weekends or two.
          I often used to go for a walk around her college wishing to get a glimpse of her.One afternoon I saw her but I dint had guts to approach her.I saw her leave in front of my eyes,she waved an auto and sat in the first left seat . She was wearing pink and was looking real pretty. Few days later, I saw her again wearing pink, not same dress though, and was sitting in the exact place. I noticed two things, this girl loves pink and always sits in the first left seat of an auto.I told her one day that she likes pink and sits in the exact place as I told before. She got impressed and asked in curiousity, how i know.Inspired from a movie,i said"its a like a gift, u know. 'm not proud of it". :D

      Days passed and i started to fell for her.I told her in fb that i was in love with her "
But why would she care cos she already has a boyfriend arse" I said to myself.But still I just wanted to tell her how i feel for her.
   She said she very much liked me but as she was commited ,its better to stay as good friends.. EXPECTED ANSWER..u know telling a girl you love her and getting a negative reply plus a reply like "we could be friends.u know" is just like your mom saying" your dog died .but you can still keep him".
 But i couldn't just let her go.I never knew what love was,until this girl came in.
   
     I knew that was going to happen.but I took my chances and asked her,that was good enough for me.
I stopped texting her for a while as I had to go to my college for internship practicals and vivas.(ahh..just a formality.our college give numbers randomnly ;) marks depends on luck basically).I went to my college and practicals were over that same day. So we headed for the 'after party' . I sat there ,thinking of her,and drank beer in the name of umm m..whatever saint is incharged for our type of partial lovers.
     I think i made the mistake by telling her. even more stupidly, I made the mistake of sticking with what i said instead of denying it and playing the whole "i'm kidding" thing. Actually, I initially did, but decided to risk it. U know that 'you gotta risk it to take the biscuit'.
  
      I have fallen on the streets, in soccer field and even from a really big wall, and now in love. I am still lying on my bed but i have no wound this time to prove that I tripped over anything.I dont want to disengage myself from her influence cos 'm loving it. :)